Morbidly Obese

I'm F-A-T! I hate being an adult. You get F-A-T! I remember it's way easier to lose weight in college than now. It's easier to lose the beergut in college than now. It's easier to make money than now. Life was bittersweet then but hell it's a lot better than now. I can't seem to fit into my clothes anymore. And hell I don't want to give up my illicit love affair with the equine race ( read: redhorse and colt45 parehos kabayo n_n ).

I'm fat. Please help me lose weight without dieting and exercise. Please.

P.S. No surgeries please. I need a miracle to get rid of the fat. Not mere medical intervention.

Green With Envy

Is it me? Or is it human to be phlegm-green with envy if you encounter someone from the past who managed to make it big in business? Not just big, really big. You still have traces of that someone, familiar to you, a companionship no one can really take away. And yet, the sheer distance of where your paths led you now closing down again as the roads take you back together. I'm in awe at how easy it was for that someone to buy this and that and yet you still talk bout the old times like nothing's changed. Except he's made it. I haven't yet. Possibly never get that far.

Is it because of family and connections? Possibly a little push for maturity. Is it out of luck? Or hardwork? Or proper timing? Maybe a little of everything. So here I am. Eyes wide open in awe. An approving pat on the back. And a little slit behind the ears oozing with a tinge of envy. Perhaps a little unintentional bruise on the self-esteem. But ultimately happy for finding a friend you've almost lost along the long journey of conquering all your dreams.

Green is for envy. So is for hope.

A Good Day to Die

Worst fears confirmed... I'm lost... Hurt...Numb....Jaded....

I have board review sked for tom and I can't concentrate... Numb... Jaded....

Squatter Power!

I watched the critically-acclaimed and award-winning masterpiece Slumdog Millionaire a week ago and it captivated me. The cinematography, the storyline and the child actors were perfect. I think the filmmakers gave justice to the harsh reality of living in slums without glamorizing on the triumphs that will eventually come the way of the main characters.

The movie focuses on the harrowing life of people living in extreme poverty in the streets of Mumbai, the largest city in India. Caught in the middle of the social storm is Jamal Malik and his older brother Salim. The movie starts with a torture scene involving a now-grown-up Jamal and the local police. He was eventually tied-down and was asked to explain how he was able to manage answering the grueling questions in the game show Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? The daunting story of his life in the slums, marred by tragedy, crime and sibling rivalry slowly begins to unfold as he patiently clarifies how he was able to answer each question leading to the next top question and instantly making him a millionaire.

In the poster release of the movie a tagline in a WW2BAM format says something like: What does it take to find a lost love? A. Money B. Smarts C. Luck D. Destiny. If you come to look at it Jamal, even as child, was naturally lucky. He got an autograph signed by his favorite movie actor while stinking so bad after jumping off into a shit-hole. Some of the questions during the game required deep inherent knowledge about many queer things and yet he was able to answer it purely out of luck which includes the final 20-million rupee question. His brother Salim, on the other hand, was also naturally envious of Jamal's luck. He locked the comfort room's door from the outside so that Jamal couldn't see his moviestar idol; he sold Jamal's autographed picture of that moviestar to a local collector; he let go of Latika (the girl they unoffically adopted as their sister) when they escaped from the clutches of a local syndicate and many more. His envy, however, never gets in the way of him protecting his younger brother. So you might actually say that part of Jamal's luck is his brother's protective love of him. In a way, Salim has an innate hatred of Jamal, for Jamal with luck gets most of the things they both wanted including the love of Latika. Salim eventually fell into the seduction of money and power becoming a hitman for a big mafia don while ironically maintaining his deep Islam religiousity.

Jamal's unconditional love for Latika drives him to join into the gameshow. With the hope that Latika is watching. He maybe the only person who was there in that gameshow who was not after the money. He grew up from nothing and thus, he's got nothing to lose. What he is afraid of most, is the possibility of never finding Latika again. In the final throes of the movie, Salim, the ever-protective brother, gave Latika her freedom at the expense of his own life. Bathing is a tub-full of ill-gotten money, Salim open-fired on his boss and his people which cost him his mortality. Jamal was able to answer the final question, became an underdog millionaire and fulfilled his destiny of being with Latika.

Watching the movie, you cannot help but feel secured and contented with what we have in our lives. The poor people of India are way more pitiful than the poor here in the Philippines. A slum area as far and wide as the eye can see is a screaming irony of how people are supposed to have been born equal. The movie, at the end of the day, gives hope to all of us. We choose our own destiny, as the cliche goes. Let us not forget that we all have chances to be great and significant. What matters is the choice that we make. Hopefully, my friends, we will get a shot at greatness. And when that time comes, I promise you, mine will never be less than grand. :-)

Black Velvet

2 Saturdays ago, I mentioned that I did go to a seminar by PARM. During the after hours, I met Dame^ who was also undergoing a training seminar by TESDA for her job at her school. Anyway, I met her friend (I forgot the name), a chubby guy with a musculine voice who speaks gay lingo (which I find a bit too much and too creepy to take). I think he's a closet queen for all I care. Anyway, he brought us to a place called Black Velvet. It is a comedy bar located in the heart of Bacolod's nigthlife district of which I don't know the name.
It was my first time to go to a comedy bar. The entrance was a decent 45 pesos per person and when we entered, the place was already swarmed with customers. We were just lucky for as we entered, a group of people were leaving and we had an empty table for the three of us. The comedy team was made up of 5 comedians: 3 crossdressing fags, a woman (who allegedly is the aunt of Sheryn Regis who trained her in singing) and a dwarf woman (who is perhaps the shortes unano^ I have ever seen in my entire life).
The comedy group delivered a lot of jokes and stints that made me roll of my chair with bellyaching laughter. The dwarf, Jenny, was very witty and cracks a lot of very good jokes. Aya, the tall fag with a great fasetto singing voice, and the woman ( I forgot here name) sang very well. In fact, the alleged-Sheryn-Regis-aunt is one of those singers who can hit long and high notes without seeming to strain. I mean I don't see the veins of her throat engorging as she belted out the high notes. Their routine was basically made up of the stereotypical videoke and stand up spiel. Dame enjoyed the show so much she wanted to come back the next night.
And so we did. During the second night, of course they had to repeat some of their routine and some of the lines that they did from the night before. However, for what it's worth Jenny, the dwarf, made my night with her impromptu call-center spiel with a customer ( who was well-applauded for being such a good sport). However, when Mariposa ( an ugly fag with a Pokwang-face who makes funny facial distortions) was on stage, a table of customers booed him. Those wretched kids ( teenagers) sort-of retorted back cause they were singled out by the comedian when they entered. "Oh mga bata, ari kamo d? Kabalo mga ginhikanan nyo nga gakadto kamo d?". The audience roared in laughter, much to the ire of the kids. So when Mariposa got back on the stage, they booed him and lambasted his lines. I think it's insulting enough not to be laughed at when you are a comedian. It's worse if you're booed if you're a performer. The hecklers went on and on with their booing until even the comedians themselves almost lost their composure for the arrogant behaviour of those sick bastards.
After a brief picture taking with Jenny, we left the place satisfied but with a grain of salt. I felt sorry for Mariposa but I think it's admirable how he maintained his composure throughout the heckling. I also noticed a deep, deep sadness embedded in the eyes of the comedians. Their faces were bright with laughter but their eyes tell a different story. These performers may not be considered heroes of the new day. But hell, we are all like them. Everyday we tread on, putting on a show to get people to like us, to love us. We brave on the insults people who don't like us and we go on living. We do it repeatedly, on a daily basis. We put on a good show. And in show business, no matter what happens, the show must go on. The show must go on.

Seminar

Last week was hellweek for all of us. We were required to join in a sing-and-dance fundraising concert that featured faculty, administration, maintenance and staff at San Pablo. So it means wasting a lot of energy on after class practices that may last as late as 10 or something in the evening. Everynight for more than a month. Of course, I only joined in the group chorale and not in any vocal solo or group dance. That means I got to go home earlier than almost everyone their including my PT colleagues. Fast forward to the presentation. Errr... it was successful. Errr... nothing much to say about it really. Except, I get some LSS from the songs we sang, particularly St Francis Prayer. Anyway, I'm going to write about some things I've learned from the seminar I attended last Saturday at L'Fisher Bacolod. We were sponsored by Doc G as this was a seminar by the Philippine Academy of Rehabilitation Medicine (PARM).

Here are new things I've learned:

1. The following things (in direct order) are protective against Parkinson's Disease: caffeine, green tea, smoking and aspirin/NSAIDS ----- mroe reasons to drink coffee and smoke
2. The following events may be indicative of PD in the early stages: constipation, sleep disturbances, swallowing difficulties; we also have to take note of olfactory disturbances as it may present even before the motor symptoms arise ( such as bradykinesia, nystagmus, postural instability) ; drooling is also a manifestation of bradykinesia
3. 2 major subtypes of PD have been identified:

• Tremor dominant type- this is more common in younger patients; possible mental status impariment
• Gait difficulty/ postural instability dominant type

4. Poor response to Levodopa treatment may suggest other types of clinical conditions

5. PD is not a purely motor disease; there are underlying sensory and cognitive deficits as well

6. Speech and Gait disturbances cannot be cured by medicine; Rehab is still important in these field of PD treatment

7. Punding- is a term used for obessessive-compulsive traits in PD; fascination, repetitive manipulation of technical equipment, continual examining and handlling of common objects

8. After five years of L-dopa tx- 50% of patients will develop motor fluctuations

9. Polio foot is mostly inverted; the good foot is everted (for wider base of support)

10. Most severe pain in post polio syndrome: knees, legs, wrists; pain is caused by overfatigue or overexertion

11. Foot deformity-most common deformity in polio (not genu recurvatum)

12. Magnets are effective in tx of pain et fatigue; Non-swimming exercises are indicated ( cold intolerance)

13. One sign of migraine is a common fear to stay in a dark room ( claustrophobia); migraine is a throbbing headache accompanied with nausea et vomitting with a pain scale of at least 6; lower than 6 p/s is not a migraine

14. Headache alarms:

• sudden onset - may indicate a stroke
• associated fever- may indicate meningitis or other infectins
• worst headache ever- subarachnoid bleed/ anuerysm
• late onset new headache (for old people)- stroke
• headache associated with mental status changes - tumor/stroke
• increasingly progressive headache- stroke
• focal neurologic signs - tumor/stroke
• assoc. with exertion, valsalva, after sex- aneurysm

15. All anti-hypertensive drugs cause impotence particularly beta-blockers

16. a BP of 160/100 requires combination therapy ( 2 drugs or more)

17. Hypertensive crisis- has a diastole of 120 or 130; Hypertensive emergency - very high BP secondary/ leading to end organ damage requiring immediate BP lowering; Hypertensive urgency- no end-organ damage; correct BP within 24-48 hours

18. If your child is obese by age 14, 80-100% obese for life

19. Signs of arterial occlusion/ disease: pallor, pulselessness, parestheisa, paralysis, polar sensation

20. Venous ulcers of the foot=normal pulses; found usually in peri-malleolar area; arterial ulcers=abnormal/absent pulses, distal digits first affected

I hope you learned something from here. Till I write again. Baboooh

The Presentation

Yesterday was a total victory for me! I slept very late (2:30 am) the night before just to finished the f*****g PowerPoint class presentation I had to do for my class observation. (Remember that time I kept on complaining that the school was teaching us how to be teachers through the use of technology? Internet bullstuff and the like?). Now is the crunchtime for that. I wasn't so sure they were gonna push for a real teaching demo using all those whatevers they meant to tell us. But now, it's here. I have to deal with it.

I have to choose a topic to discuss and the subject matter should be delivered in the technology-based prescription that Dr. H wanted. It was a toss between Neuroanatomy ( The Cranial Nerves and the Autonomic Nervous System) and Orthotics and Prosthetics ( Orthotic Prescription for Special Conditions). I was like ano man? ano nami d man? daw kabudlay gd haw?ah ndi ah daw ok man lng ni ah.pero din di man? tsk tsk. Then after much internal deliberation, I made my choice. The topic that I will discuss is...... ( music)..........................

PAULTHENICS 402! The Christian Filipino Family. Bwahaha teh man!

Fast forward yesterday afternoon. After I finished my pre-internship CI at Saviour Hospital, I rushed home for lunch, another shower, and to shave my beard for my presentation. I f-----g cut my chin ( 2 bloody cuts) while shaving as I seldom shave so I have no engram formation as to the prevention of this event. I put on a light blue striped polo shirt and cream pants and readied myself for the observation.

Finally, it was my turn and I ushered my advisory class inside the computer lab. Dr H then asked for my topic outline. Topic outline? What the hell is that? My mind was racing. And I mentally screamed OH SHIT! Now, I remember. Yah, we were indeed supposed to give a topic outline so she will know the flow of the lecture. I didn't have it but I managed a weak smile and said " err, doc, uhm, topic outline? hehe. do we need to have one? hehe...err, i didn't know kac eh.. hehe.. but, uhm, i promise to make one for you later..hehe" Must've sounded so dumb and stupid there but that is really all there is to say.

I started the class right away. Flashing my grand PowerPoint Presentation for my advisory class. Ha! Ginpulawan ko ubra ni! THIS IS PERFECT! SO ELITE IS SHOULD PUT A COPYRIGHT AFTER I PRESENT THIS PERFECT POWERPOINT! And there I raged, enthusiastically discussing the Christian Filipino Family, slide after slide. I talked about religion and the importance of it to our family. I talked of family worship and going to mass together. I talked about the faith, love, and sacrifice for our family. Damn it! I was so righteous right then and there I could've have been ordained a priest had the Pope witnessed my charisma. Each mouseclick brought on a new slide with color, pictures and words to captivate the class. Masterful presentation. Moving words. I was a cavalier with my perfect powerpoint crap as my lance and my passionate voice as my armor. I reeked in benevolent condescension right from the beginning. And the class was captivated! ( Clap! Clap! Clap!)

Then it was over. Whew! The class dragged their sorry asses out of the room as Dr H called me to discuss my score. I was expecting a high grade based on that PP presentation. Of course, who would be dumb enough not to see my talent in PP presentation! That was the bomb! That was awesome! PERFECT POWERPOINT!...................................

Do you really want to know what happened next? Halos tanan to sa PowerPoint ko sala! BWAHAHAH! Na muna ke absent permi sa ICT training. My presentation it turned out was flooded with errors. Wrong font, wrong font size, wrong colors, wrong background, wrong stuff tanan hahaha. Dr H told me hindi ka ba nakinig. And I answered back "eh, hehe, kasi doc uhm, i thought it would be, erm, okay to be spontaneous, uhm, hehe, pero maganda naman yung kulay d ba? hehe"
Damn, pare, ang tanga ng sagot! Bwahaha...

Fortunately though she made me pass. WOHOO!!! 88% grade ko. Not bad for a technology illiterate person like me. WEEEEEE!!! Oh xa xa matulog nako me clase pako bwas. happy reading weeeee!